I’ve been criticized before for showing too much affection, for spoiling my son too much—and that’s why he acts out, and that it has nothing to do with autism (because when you’re living with autism, everyone suddenly becomes an expert on the subject). One friend was told she was a bad mother because she uses a baby carrier; another was told it’s not normal to co-sleep. Co-sleeping sure gets people talking, doesn’t it! Being told I’ll make my child emotionally dependent on top of ruining my marriage.
Since when has giving our children all our love and wanting the best for them become a “problem”? More importantly, since when has it become anyone and everyone’s business? Since when is it okay to openly give your opinion on how one person is raising their child and claim that the other isn’t doing their job right? I own up to it—I share my daily life on Facebook, so that comes with the territory—but it’s different for my friends who get told such horrible things while they’re at a restaurant, at the park, or just going about their quiet lives. These are extraordinary moms who are doing their absolute best for their children.
Let me tell you, giving your child too much love will never be a problem, in my opinion. If only you knew how many times love, patience, and understanding toward my son have defused tantrums even better than any behavioral, cognitive, or whatever interventions. I don’t think my son will ever come up to me one day and say:
“You know, Mom, that time when, instead of leaving me on the floor with my blankie, you picked me up gently and told me you loved me—well, I’m really mad at you for that because you should’ve just let me freak out on the floor,” or “You know, Mom, that time at the doctor’s office when I freaked out and threw myself on the floor? You know, the time you stayed by my side, super patient, despite the disapproving looks… well, that time you got it all wrong.”
My point? Love can do anything; love is more powerful than anything else. And if it bothers you that someone gives their child too much love, you need to ask yourself some serious questions! Because seriously, if we showered each other with more love, I think the world would be a much better place!
Now, let moms with too much love scrapbook their kids in peace! Thanks!