I remember back in high school that famous saying, “Chill out, man!" Now that I'm 32, all I want to do is CHILL OUT.
I've never felt such a rush to have that little moment to myself. Is this what parenthood is all about? You rush to get everything done right away so that when the kids go to bed, you can finally relax. Except that, in the end, when the kids do go to bed, you’re too exhausted to do anything. But just collapsing on the couch without hearing “MOMMMM”—man, that really relaxes me!
Sometimes I envy my girlfriends who sleep in until 10 a.m. on weekends. You know, the ones who call you because they’re not really sure what to do or how to plan their day. And your Saturday is set in chunks, because that’s what a weekend is like when you’re a parent. You have to cram the 50 things you don’t get to do during the week into that little bit of time that’s supposed to be for relaxing. Very funny! Grocery shopping, laundry, cleaning, cooking for the week, etc.—you try to get all that done while feeling under the weather, because you also want to have a chance to enjoy a little bit of your afternoon or evening.
Relaxing and parenting are like relish in yogurt—they just don't go together! I get so excited when someone says the word "spa"… Oh yeah, the spa—the place where they play that nice little music… zen with comfy sofas and NO ONE TALKING!!! Can I get a monthly subscription, please?
The next time someone tells me to "RELAX," I'm going to say, "Thanks for the offer, but here's my kid, "Bye-bye!"