What’s the ideal age to have a child? When is the perfect time in life to start a family? In your 20s, or your 30s?
As far back as I can remember, when I was young, I couldn’t wait to become a mother. Yet it wasn’t because I was crazy about kids. I didn’t do much babysitting, and there weren’t any young children around me, but I imagined myself as a young mom with a baby of my own! So, at age 18, when I got pregnant with my first daughter, my dream had sort of come true.
I had no experience with babies, and neither did anyone around me. I figured out my role one day at a time, and I don’t think I could have been a better mother if I’d waited another 10 years.
At the time, I was studying at CEGEP, and I never saw any problem with continuing my studies and having a child. I took a semester off—much like working women do when they take maternity leave—and I finished my studies afterward.
Of course, at that age, you’re just starting out in life and haven’t accumulated much yet. We lived in a small three-and-a-half-room apartment, and my beautiful Jade shared our room in her crib for a few months before we could move. My little sweetheart wanted for nothing. She drank Mom’s nourishing milk, wore cute little outfits, and was surrounded by love—lots and lots of love! Some people wait for the perfect moment: the beautiful house, the good job… I’ve never believed in that. In my opinion, there’s no ideal time or perfect age. I think it’s really a personal choice.
My situation might not have seemed ideal to some, but I’ve never regretted having a child so young. Sure, my reality was completely different from my friends’, but being a mom fulfilled me, and I bonded with other young moms.
Having a child at a young age doesn’t have to be an obstacle in life. It’s not your baby who’s going to hold you back—it’s you.
My oldest is now 18—the same age I was when I was pregnant with her. It’s strange to think about it, and I have to say I’m in no rush to become a grandmother, but that will be her decision, and no matter how old she is, when that day comes, I’ll be there for her. The important thing is to be happy, to keep growing as a person, and to pursue your goals and dreams.
There’s no set age for being a good mom—it’s a skill you learn, whether you’re 18 or 35… you just have to listen to your heart! There hasn’t been a single day in my life when I’ve regretted this choice.
Kim Faucher