Have you ever asked yourself this question, or have you found yourself coming to this realization? One way or another, we end up believing it—or at least convincing ourselves of it. We know ourselves better than anyone else, but it’s also true that sometimes we manage to surprise ourselves.
For example, our ability to stay calm in completely crazy situations where many others would have lost their footing. In a family context, these situations might involve people who meddle in your children’s upbringing in a non-constructive way and never stop judging. Because those who make the worst comments often don’t have children or have never had to face your situation or your reality. People rely on us as long as we can hold it together. Because all too often, we forget about ourselves; we lose our self-control when we’ve reached our limit, or when we need to draw the line. We’re fed up with having to justify ourselves and being looked down upon. We’re often expected to do far more than we’re capable of.
Asking others to do things for us—I’m not saying it doesn’t help; on the contrary! But am I the only one who can’t seem to be completely satisfied with it and who’s always looking for the fly in the ointment? I really appreciate it when help comes without me asking for it, and I even tell myself, “Finally! I couldn’t take holding the reins all by myself anymore!” But feeling guilty for not having managed it on my own, by myself—I just can’t help it.
And that’s when I have to find a way to let go of that guilt. I see it as a flaw and feel like I wasn’t able to fulfill my obligations. Of course, I did feel a sense of calm—because let’s be honest: we need breaks! We need to learn to accept them and savor that moment of calm. Let that feeling take precedence over the guilt. Reclaim who we are and treat ourselves without feeling selfish. If we can trust ourselves, it’s because we have confidence in ourselves—and that’s just fine.
We hear the following phrase far too often: “You can only rely on yourself in life.” To that phrase, we should add: “But let yourself be helped more often.”
Do you trust yourself? How does doing things on your own make you feel?