In our society filled with war and violence, screens and technology, inequality and injustice, and role models—both female and male—that leave much to be desired, one question stands out: What do I want to teach my children?
For my daughters, it would be specifically about sexuality. In schools, young girls are judged, victimized, and feel tremendous pressure. If you haven’t had sex by 9th grade, you’re a prude, a goody-two-shoes. If you don’t want to, but your boyfriend does, sometimes they’ll go so far as to force you. If you’ve had sex before 9th grade, you’re a slut, and people turn against you. In short, too much or not enough… but never just right.
What I want to teach my daughters is self-respect, but also respect for the other girls around them—not to let social pressure get the better of them. Above all, I want them to know they can always count on me and that I’m here to empower them.
For my son or sons, it would be respect for women and consent. I’m sick of people saying that a girl “asked for it” by wearing a skirt, or that she needs to be careful. I don’t want the girls around my son to feel anxious or have to watch their backs—no, I want my little guy to exude confidence and respect for them.
For my children, I want them to experience what I’ve learned! Evenings spent playing in the snow or playing soccer instead of playing on a tablet. I want them to participate in sports or the arts that will make them feel confident. I want to teach them kindness; I never want to see my children bully another child! I’m going to teach them self-confidence, pushing themselves to new heights, and perseverance. I don’t necessarily want them to pursue a BIG degree; I want them to find their calling and achieve professional fulfillment!
I have a long way to go, because none of this is easy, but just as I want to teach my children, I’ll have confidence in myself and won’t let pressure from others dictate how I raise my children.
What about you—what do you want to teach your children?