When my daughter was 9 months old, I decided to move to Alberta to be with my boyfriend.
I didn’t know if I was moving there permanently or just until the end of my maternity leave.
In the end, the end of my maternity leave came much sooner than expected.
On a whim, I decided to stay in Edmonton.
And it was the best and worst decision of my life: I fell into a depression. Literally. I cried every night (poor boyfriend of mine) because I didn’t have a job and was stuck in a tiny basement apartment, with no friends or family.
People would invite me out, and I’d turn them down—I was really down.
I never could have imagined that raising a child far from family would feel like this:
- FaceTime calls where you get a lump in your throat because you miss your family
- The sadness you feel when you think about how they don’t get to see your children grow up (except in photos)
- The hundreds of dollars spent on plane tickets and/or gas.
- Seeing your friends get together for parties and not being able to be there
- The big events you miss, like a friend giving birth, a baptism, a wedding…
Except one morning I decided enough was enough. That I was going to make the most of the chance I had to start over. My daughter would speak English, I’d find a job, I’d be more positive. And it worked. By seeing my move as a positive step, my life fell back into place.
To you, the mom living far away—even though it’s all tough sometimes—never forget that if you’re far away, it’s for a reason. Your family’s well-being? A better job? A better lifestyle?
Also, tell yourself that when you have visitors come over, it’s a huge party! During the holidays, you enjoy those special moments 1,000 times more.
Over time, the sadness fades and you get used to it—I promise.